Rebecca L. Page

Hey Warrington! Let's run away. I'm bored with this whole school thing now. And I HAVE NO *BEST FRIEND to keep me here. I hear they make great chili cheese fries in the states. Am I tempting you yet?

Also, if we're assigned one more essay, I just may snap and throw myself or someone off the Astronomy Tower. Consider this fair warning.


_{*Best friend of the Matt variety. I still have the Kate variety, obviously, and she rocks more than you.}

I think Kate and I are all settled into our room. I have to say, the view is fabulous. I refuse to be one of those people complaining about London because, hey, it's warmer than Scotland! I mean my home is so far north it's practically Arctic. And there's fun to be had in London and no one, apparently, to tell us no. I think Trimble and Belby are too inept to actually do anything with us. Did you notice that the itinerary seems to be non-existent? This is fantastic!

So. Warrington. Entertain me or something. My alterna-bff seems to have disappeared. Matt, are you even alive?

Okay, whoever stole my journal last night? NOT ON. I did not appreciate your faux-drunken shenanigans. I repeat. NOT ON. Kate and I were happily minding our own business and performing our usual BFF rituals (which are very secret - don't ask) and I didn't even notice my journal was missing until later. That was a disgrace! I am the victim of a HATE CRIME!

[Private to KFF]

Oh my fucking god. I have a hickey on my neck that is shaped vaguely like Britain and Scotland (minus Wales). What the bloody fuck? That was so fun though. I've got this blinding hangover. Who the fuck keeps hitting the wall? I think the people next door are having sex. Are you in the loo?

[/Private]

KATE FINNCH-FLETCHLEY YOU ARE MY SOULMATE WITHEOUT A SOUL! YOU ARE TEH ONLY GIRL I WOULD EVER KISSSSS!

For thos of you who were not in the cave tonite you should have in been because it was AMAZZING. KFC and I looked SO FUCKING HOT and my BOOBS are GREAT! That's what the guy whose name I coulednt prounounce said. FUCKING GREAT.

I LOVE COPENHAAGEN!

Pheebs!!! I think there's something wrong with our room again. It's cursed this year! I don't know what in the bloody hell is happening but it's burning up in here and it's not that hot anywhere else. If this keeps up, I'm sleeping in the Common Room or something. I've got the windows open and it's still hot.

Hey Matt, what would a girl have to do for some of your sweet milk-chocolate filling? I need comfort food.

No school on Wednesday! So amazing. I'm sorry, but I'm not going to a memorial service for a girl I didn't know. Death is so fucking weird. I'm so not thinking about it. I am, however, taking advantage of a day out of this place.

So, friend folk, I put it to you. What sort of trouble shall we cause? James, I'm sure you have an idea for fun. Don't you always? There has to be something exciting to do. I'm bored. And I want to feel alive.

Hey Charlie. Take me out for a drink on Wednesday. Make it fun.

Well fuck me. Someone's really dead. It's hard to be overly dramatic about it when the main points of the speech seemed to be about the following:

• N*CHANT


• Drunkenness


• Sex


• Roving attack ravines

I've decided that sex is out until the mental image of Slughorn, drunk and fornicating, is gone from my mind. I still wonder if someone is really dead or if this was just a sneaky way of trying to enforce abstinence. Because, right now, I want to jump into a ravine.

You know, I was just talking to Matt in person when a comment popped up from him on my journal. Only he didn't write it. I think some of them have taken journals and they can see us now. They know what we're doing. The network has been compromised!

[Private to Matt]

Just roll with it, yeah? It should be a good laugh.

[/Private]

[Private to Kate]

God, my fucking head is killing me. Now I'm going to be forced to fuck with the hysterical ones.

[/Private]

Attention boys of Hogwarts! Someone who is not suffering from erectile dysfunction, please deliver pastries to Gryffindor in exchange for my undying gratitude and a minimal display of affection. Make sure chocolate is included somewhere.

Oh Merlin, the stench! Words cannot express. I'm not sure if someone left something in the room all summer and the house elves didn't notice or someone came with a loaded truck (and I mean loaded in the very worst way), but it smells horrible in here. I've had to resort to a bubblehead charm and I haven't had to do this since that outbreak of dung bombs in fourth year. I think the dung bombs were better!

You know, school used to be really exciting. Those tingles of anticipation when school was getting ready to start. That first moment when you were in your room again and you had the whole year ahead of you.

Now it just stinks. Literally. Air freshener please? Opening the windows isn't helping.

( Excuse me. I'm going to hell. )